My Sister's Keeper [Kasper]

[jacobi]

WARNING: CHARACTER DEATH

The room is silent. Jacobi stands alone. A single file dangles from his hand, a hand that has cut and sewn many a body, a steady hand that now shakes as though palsied. In bold letters, the name Kasper Hunt glares up at him.

It can’t be true, and yet, there is little reason for the records to have been faked and, when he stops to think about it, Jacobi realizes that the signs have been there all along, adding up like dominoes being readied for a fall, he’s simply refused to see them.

The fear in her eyes, he’d attributed it to the past, to all of the times when he could have stopped everything but had been far too young, too ignorant, to consider taking action. He’d seen it not as fear, but as a kind of accusation, a sign that some things couldn’t be swept under the rug, regardless of how much time had passed. The shaking had been much the same, a facet of fear, of distrust, and the occasional cough had been overlooked, because it never occurred to him that something might be amiss, that she might be suffering from something more taxing than the common cold. It never occurred to him that his services might be best used elsewhere, that while he was off tending to the forgotten unfortunates in the Rock Tunnel prison and giving speeches in Unova, championing the Lux cause, the one person that he ought to have been looking out for was once again slipping away from him, only this time, there’d be no seeking her out years after the fact.

He’d seen little enough of her since they’d run into one another at the hospital in Goldenrod, though he’d been sure to keep tabs on her whereabouts, and if she’d looked a little off at the last council meeting, he’d attributed it to nerves, anxiousness at being trapped in a room with him, or the losing the debates, or simply rising tensions between the war’s two major factions, but this, this was a beast of a different kind.

It occurs to him now that he should have noticed, that he should have paid her a few more visits. He’d learned where she’d taken up residence quickly enough, after all, and yet he hadn’t. He’d wanted her to come to him, to accept that his intentions were pure, that he wanted little more than to reconnect with the sister he’d thought he’d lost…The sister he’s going to lose.

He imagines her now, scared and alone, lungs filling with blood until she can do little more than gurgle and gasp, knows that, in all likelihood, he’s failed her yet again, stood inactive when he could have made all the difference. He’s definitely not getting a big brother of the year award, but perhaps there’s still time, perhaps he can save her. No, there has to be time. He will save her…provided the illness hasn’t progressed past the point of no return. Eisenmenger Syndrome: the prognosis is grim, but he’s beaten near impossible odds before. If he can seal up the breach, reroute the blood flow and reduce some of the pressure on her lungs, there may yet be a chance - A slim chance. If it’s progressed too far, she’ll need a transplant. Jacobi knows for a fact that the waiting list for lung transplants, hell for any kind of transplant, is a mile long.

The sound of a fist slamming into a filing cabinet is the last thing heard from the records room before Jacobi and Trillium vanish from sight.

When they reappear, they’re in a living room that ought to be unfamiliar. Jacobi knows it well, though he’s never been there when its owner has been present. Now he calls to her and hopes against hope, vowing that he won’t fail her this time that, if necessary, he’ll cut down the entire transplant list himself, one patient at a time.

“Kasper?”

[kasper]

She knew this was the end. The end of everything she had lived for. And when she knew her last hours were almost up, she dropped what pokeballs she had outside her door, allowing them to wander around the apartment building. It wasn't unusual for her to do that, and the neighbors seemed alright with it. No one would assume there was something terribly wrong with the girl that lived in apartment 307. The only one that remained was Simba. Her companion since birth, the only friend she had left. everyone else was gone. Xander, her best human friend, the man that had destroyed a city just for her return. Gabriel, the man she had loved, if only for a short time. It all came down to this, this moment where she knew everything was ending. It was sad to think that her life had been so short, if only her parents had actually cared about her those first five years. If only her brother had been strong enough.

She coughed harshly, covering her mouth as Simba whined beside her. She had long since been able to speak, only give her companion eye commands. He nosed at her hand, wanting to see what was wrong, his eyes filled with sadness as he slowly came to realize that soon enough, she wouldn't be around. That there would no longer be a Kasper Hunt around. Simba whined once more, his ears lowering as he pushed his nose against her nose, a low whine escaping him every few moments as Kasper wrapped her arms weakly around her pokemon, holding him close, her tears silently as he struggled to breath more. She hadn't even been able to get a hold of Erik. And so, she was dying alone it seemed.

Her eyes half-closed, she didn't see the shadow falling over in her kitchen. Simba did, the Arcanine going on full alert as his eyes narrowed down, and fierce expression coming over his features as he stepped in front of his dying owner. Kasper's eyes opened slightly to see the last person she expected. Jacobi. Jacobi Harris. Her brother. Was this all a dream? And why was she dreaming about that man? " Jac-… " She barely sputtered out, grabbing onto her pokemon's fur and pulling herself forwards. She nearly collapsed over, if not for his shoulder to catch her, her body trembling to the point that it was amazing she hadn't fallen over yet. Her eyes turned towards him, pleading for him to do something, anything at all. She just wanted it to end, in any way possible.

A thought occurred to her then, a pad of paper splattered with her own blood, a pen in hand as she trembled and attempted to write out a phrase, showing it to her brother. " Find homes for my pokemon. Send the majority of them to Erik Alejandro.. He's in Kanto. Tell him they're from me.. And that I loved him like a brother. " She paused in holding up the paper, then lowered to write once more, showing him what she had written, trying to suppress a cough. " I want you to have Simba.. Take care of him.. please… " And with that, she dropped the pad, her hands coming to the floor as she shuddered hard, coughing up blood, Simba looking between them, whining as he looked at Kasper, and then a half whine, half growl as his amber eyes turned on Jacboi, pleading for him to save his trainer.

[jacobi]

There are no second chances.

The transplant list could contain a single name and it wouldn't matter. She's little more than a shadow of the woman that he'd so longed to get to know, of the sister that he'd promise to protect, soon to be a husk. He can see it in her eyes. The fear is still there, but now it's warring with agony and anguish, despair and hope. He's seen that look before, seen it in the eyes of a young girl being stuck with a needle of Latios only knew what, he certainly hadn't known back then. All he'd known is that Kasper would spend the rest of the night locked in her room, and he could hear her whimpering through the wall.

Some nights she would scream for hours as their parents latest concoctions coursed through her veins, unable to cope with the images and sensations assailing her as they held her in their sway. Why they never tested any of it on him he never bothered to ask, afraid that if he mentioned it, they might very well welcome a second guinea pig for their little experiments. In the end, he'd aided their efforts with his silence. He should have protected her.

It's that look that tells him that it's too late, that this is the end. He could make Castelia's hospitals run red with blood in an effort to get her on the transplant list, but it would all be for naught. There's not enough time. He can see it in her eyes, hear it in the way she gasps when she tries to say his name (he'd have given anything to hear his name on her lips again, to have her trust him enough to ask some favor of him, however small but this...this is too much, this is the one favor he's not entirely sure he can grant).

Cautiously he skirts around the growling Arkanine, wondering how best to approach, and then she begins to move. He watches her wobble, watches the way her body jerks and trembles, the way her knees nearly buckle under her weight and finds himself reaching out to steady her. If the damn dog decides to bite him, so be it. But the bite never comes, though the growling intensifies. Simba means to make his displeasure at Jacobi's nearness to his beloved trainer known. Jacobi barely even notices.

Kaspers chest rattles when she breathes, signifying that her lungs are near full to bursting with fluid, with blood. The implications of the sound are impossible to ignore and his expression darkens as she struggles to pen a note, to make her wishes known.

It isn't the note that breaks him, with its obviousness acceptance of her imminent death, it's the look in her eyes and the realization that he's failed her in more ways than he can count. For a moment they're children again and she's half delirious and unable to speak, her eyes begging him to do something, anything to end it all, only this time he can. It'd be so easy - send her off to a permanent, dreamless sleep. It could be done with a single injection, a single push of a plunger.

Moments like these, when he exists to grant death, he lives for them. When he reaches an arm around Kasper to steady her, scoops her up and carries her back to the couch, Jacobi finds that the familiar rush that comes with taking up the angel's guise will not come. Instead, the edges of despair begin to creep in and it occurs to him that he can't do this, that he's going to fail her once again, that he's weak...he's always been weak. His hands are shaking again as he sets her down and tucks a lock of sweat soaked hair behind one ear. He can no longer meet her eyes, the eyes that keeping asking him what her voice cannot, asking him to save her.

The Arkanine has taken to pacing back and forth beside the couch, but he stops when Jacobi turns away from her. For a moment, their gazes lock, man and beast, and Jacobi sees another plea for help in Simba's eyes. Kasper's chest rattles as she sucks in a breath and that makes the decision for him. He can't stand to see her like this.

Trillium reappears in a flash of red light. He and Jacobi vanish.

The hospital seems far too loud when they reappear within it. Nurses pass by chatting with one another as though nothing is amiss. One of them smiles at him. He doesn't smile back.

A few minutes later he stands with a syringe in hand and wonders if he can go through with it. He pockets the syringe. For once in his life, he's going to do something for someone other than himself. He hates himself for it.

Trillium returns him to Kasper's side and Jacobi scoops her up and settles down with her in his arms. When she tries to talk, tries to force words to come, he shakes his head and brings a finger to her lips. He already knows what she wants to say.

If syringe feels heavy in his pocket, it feels even heavier in his hand. "This will make you sleep," he says. "This will take all the pain away." And much quieter, after he sticks the needle into her arm and presses the plunger down: "I'm sorry."